It's crazy in the world, why bother to go to the blue sky?

my father thought for a few seconds and thought it was reasonable. Why did he go to college when it was so hot?

there is no doubt that if I have some antisocial and fear of social genes or traits, it all comes from my father, a person who has lived through a long period of failure and will fail until the last minute of his life.

my father's character is weird, his hobby is smoking, drinking, and playing mahjong, and nothing is worth fighting for. He treats everything carelessly and laughs at the ups and downs of the world. He is neither proud of his failure, nor self-abased for his failure, never listens to anyone's opinions, nor changes himself for anyone's sake. From a personal point of view, it is not too much to win the Grand Slam of life.

he is full of wrong predictions about many things, big to the development trend of an era, small to the trifles of the neighborhood, which undoubtedly caused his life to retreat one after another, only to me, hit the nail on the head, very early. When I was still a round-faced cutie, he said, "this kid can't do it." later, I grew up and fulfilled his prediction. I was very bad in all aspects. I soon overtook him in the matter of failure, and now, at a young age, I am already the most failed person in the family.

unlike me, who is full of grievances and blames society for all the mistakes, my father has neither desire nor demand. Inside, he is very peaceful, Love &  Peace, Fresh &  Sweet. He is chic and comfortable, and a person is a river and lake, while my life is a miasma and a mess, falling into a bottomless abyss of pain.

at that time, when I was a child, in the golden 1990s, from my immature and biased point of view, men generally did not value their family life or did not understand what family life was, or they had a strange misunderstanding of family life. Even popcorn movies like Transformers 5 knew "Without sacrifice, there can be no victory." But men in the 1990s were naive enough to think that everything could be owned without paying a price, and that family life was nothing more than an enhanced version of single life, with one more woman and one more child.

A ball game, a movie, a card game can summon them together, bring in two cases of beer, drink Taihu water when they have money, drink Taihu water when they have no money, and drink three or five dishes, usually peanuts, salted beans, cucumbers, stewed geese and pig ears. They can make a loud noise all night until the wee hours of the morning when they are roared back by their wives.

this is decent. At that time, people generally did not have a clear sense of boundaries. Now, it is very strange to have no special circumstances to be friends with other people's wives, but at that time, it seems natural to think that a friend's wife is also our friend. Since we are all friends, it doesn't matter if we stay at your house all night watching football, drinking and going crazy. As a result, the disgraceful situation is to be driven out of the house hysterically and shamelessly by a friend's wife in the howl of a child, in the deafening live broadcast of the game, in the early morning before dawn.

since my father and friends were kicked out two or three times, and their friends' wives, at that time, thought their friends had completely torn their faces. After being viciously insulted as "bullshit friends", "assholes", "with them without me" and "coffin boards without a tight cover", at the invitation of my father, they began to move their positions to my house.

this is a kind of behavior that is difficult to understand. Up to now, as long as people who are not shameless and insane will not talk loudly in other people's houses in the middle of the night, but at that time, I do not know what happened, it seems to be taken for granted, no matter whether it is a working day or not, no matter how young your children are, does your wife have to get up early tomorrow morning and go out to work? No matter how much patience the other person shows and hints at your willingness to leave early, it is completely useless, and the air is filled with a sense of timely pleasure.

at first, my father and his friends tried to confuse my mother, calling her a "sensible and sensible friend" and then praising her for "knowing a general idea and talking to each other." at last, I simply invited her to join the army to drink beer and play mahjong and develop into a real one of my own, while I was placed in my bedroom, listening to the waves across the bank, whether I howled or protested, whether they were coaxing each other or beating me directly, during that time. The sound of the waves in my living room remains the same in the evening.

but my mother's brand is not good. She is anxious when she loses. When she loses, she breaks her face and tears her face. When she comes and goes, everyone thinks that my mother is boring and can't afford to lose. She no longer plays with her. Slowly, my mother wakes up and senses the falsehood of old friendship. In the middle of the night, she rushed into the living room and lifted the mahjong table. "get out of here, all of you", "the coffin board doesn't have a tight cover", "bullshit friends", "bastards", "they don't have me". In this way, the friends gradually dissipated in the night and followed the moonlight back to their homes.

although my mother showed a look of hysteria, nothing could make my father angry. His face was calm and he acted as if I wanted to reason with you now. "you can't do this." this is very disgraceful to me and everyone. "

"Zhao Zhixin, if I don't give you some color to see, I don't think you know how good you are!"

"How could I not know how good you are? didn't everyone see it today?" My father immediately became strange when he spoke.

"what do you mean?"

"what do I mean? you don't know. The Chu? Tomorrow the whole factory will be talking about how good you are. " He continued to sneer at my mother without changing his face and heart.

"you mean you're not wrong, but I'm embarrassed now?" My mother's voice shrill at once.

"I didn't say that. You said it yourself. I'm just praising you."

my friends can't come again, but they can wander around, but the passion for indulgence is still there. before long, my father figured out where to lie instead of lying at night, so he went out to drink and brag after work, sometimes he slept in other people's homes, sometimes he passed out on the street, sometimes he rolled off the bridge with the bike, and sometimes he went to his parent's house in a daze. It can be said that life is becoming more and more unbridled and enjoyable.

at first, my mother had to stay on the phone all the time, go door to door to find someone, take me to my grandparents' house to cry, get mad at my friends' house elsewhere, and wait for my father to get home. There will be a protracted war. The law of history tells us that different ideologies can't merge, and when there is a general sense of war-weariness, the Iron Curtain of the Cold War falls suddenly. Maybe it was inspired by my father, or maybe when I was watching Journey to the West, my heart was suddenly moved by Wu Cheng's words, as the saying goes, "A leaf of duckweed returns to the sea, where does not meet in life?" Why do you have to wait at home? why are you exhausted for a husband who doesn't listen to what you say? It would be better to go out by yourself, The Smiling、Proud Wanderer, and we will meet each other if we are predestined.

there is no doubt that going to nightclubs to sing and dance with sisters was the most fashionable entertainment activity at that time. They flatted each other and sent flowers to each other. When the big metal balls were shining and beating, they jumped into the dance floor and danced to the deafening sound. Wiggling was the happiest time as if they had a life of their own as if they had a happy moment as if they were still young. It is also as if I am in the Hong Kong drama "I have a date with Spring", all of which is true or false in the fast-changing lights.

sometimes my mother would sing a chorus with me on a song-ordering machine in front of the dance floor on a whim, but I couldn't get all the five notes when I was a child, and singing was a meaningless roar out of tune. So soon I was deprived of the basic right to sing. The purpose of my existence was to eat fruit dishes desperately and wait with other children for the waiter to distribute strange-smelling peanuts.

even because of essential differences in understanding of family life, parents who have entered a long cold war period will still travel together when they have the right opportunity, such as singing in a friend's nightclub. It is difficult to understand why they want to sing in a nightclub, probably because there is no special KTV at that time, or because they can watch beautiful little sisters dance after singing. After that, you can also take a bath and sauna in the bathroom of the nightclub, who knows, it was the golden 1990s anyway.

everyone has a few favorite songs, no matter how many times I sing with these people, it seems that there will always be a few songs in the past few years, such as "three plum blossoms", "A Cloud made of Rain in the Wind" for my mother, and "New Mandarin Duck and Butterfly Dream" for my father.

I don't know whether it is because the TV series "Bao Qingtian" produced by China TV in 1993 was so successful that my father loved the song very much, or whether he also felt that "yesterday was like the east running water. I can't stay away from me." Today disturbs my heart and worries, but he sings every time, stands up, seriously holds the microphone, looks at Huang on the screen, and sings "Flower World mandarin ducks and butterflies, which is crazy in the world." Why bother to go up to the blue sky? there was a light in the eyes when there was a flash in the eyes. At that time, no one could know the future, and there were many unimaginable things, such as Huang an, which is already so today. The user does not save. The relevant content does not have the right to view. 404.

maybe the lyrics predict life. "it looks like a mandarin duck and butterfly, but who can get rid of the sorrow of the world?" this story tells us not to easily choose the song of your life.

the days are still stumbling on, time is always fair to everyone, and I am no longer a carefree child. As written at the beginning of the composition, time flies, and time flies. I'm old enough to go to preschool.

Preschool is so cruel, like a microcosm of society, and like a rehearsal of my life. I go and come back howling every day. I am so able to cry, and gradually everyone is impatient with me. I was thrown on the floor at home and locked in the toilet at school. After a while, no one remembers my name Zhao Zengliang, and everyone calls me a crying ghost. I don't know what right they have to call me like that. I think they probably don't even know how to spell "howl".

it was such an ordinary heartbreaking and crying day. I went through the longest school day of my life, from dawn to dark, from dark too late at night, watching my friends being led away one by one. I cried from the school gate to the security room, from the security room to the doorman, and finally looked forward to my mother before the day passed.

my mother grabbed me to find my father, and soon found my father who was happily playing mahjong at the neighbor's house. my father showed a waking face when he saw me crying only hiccups, but he was my father. He soon calmed down.

my mother, "I'm going on a business trip today. I want you to pick it up. Why don't you know to pick it up in kindergarten?" I just know how to play mahjong all day and die at the mahjong table! "

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"Don't get excited." My father stood up slowly.

"How can I not be excited? I'm not you. I have no conscience!" Do you know that such a child will be abducted by human traffickers? you have no conscience! "

"the child has not been abducted and is still fine." My father looked at me and asked patiently, "have you been abducted by human traffickers?"

I, "hiccup."

"I want to ask you now, why don't you just answer it? isn't this your child? What on earth are you for? all you think about every day is to eat, drink and be merry. "

"Fu is," my father said righteously, "Fu is like this. You said that you are going to pick up the children in kindergarten today. Now …" He looked down at his watch and said, "it's not over yet. I'm not breaking my promise."

so my mother immediately jumped forward like a leopard, grabbed my father, and began to kick hard, and my father ran away and screamed, "Don't hit people, have something to say!"

the next day, everyone said that the mistress of the Chao Po-Tao family was closer and more fierce, and that my mother was hard-boned and like a mother worm. Sometimes being a parent is like this. The more responsible person will be unlikable and suffer more criticism and misunderstandings. It is exhausting and exhausting.

my mother had been worried and cursed that my father would die at the mahjong table one day, but she underestimated my father's ability to keep abreast of the times. I do not know from which day, the god of fate decided not to care for my father anymore, so my father always lost every game, lost every penny for two months in a row, and the whole family had only 50 yuan left. it can be said that after eating the last meal, they had to find ways to spend their lives everywhere. In the old days, classmates and colleagues were better and better, when they were thriving. My family is getting worse and poorer, and finally literally can no longer afford to eat.

under such successive blows, my father finally realized that he was a moldy physique, and there could be no good things waiting for him in life. Besides, it was time for life and death to eat. To say the least, he was not just a hobby of playing mahjong. In the future, just concentrate on smoking and drinking. In this way, my father will stop playing mahjong in a very short period. This means that we can quit playing mahjong and gambling without having to be very troublesome and tired. of course, it also shows how important it is for people to have several different hobbies.

since not (mei) went to (qian) to play mahjong, my father set aside a lot of time. At this time, the unit leader found that Comrade Zhao Zhixin seemed very empty, so they asked him to sign up for the adult college entrance examination to improve the quality of the staff, which was a great way to rise at that time. In the 1990s, higher education was not as popular as it is now, and few older people graduated from serious universities. Being a part-time college student is also a great thing. I don't know what my father thinks about it. I guess his idea is that he is idle, so go.

when I got to the last door of the exam, my father went leisurely with his admission card and a pen. He passed his children's home (that is, friends who have known each other for a long time and had a good relationship). The children were sitting in the courtyard drinking beer and eating peanuts. When they saw him, they said, "Hey, Zhao Zhixin, let's have a beer together!"

my father said, "No, I'm going to go to college later."

the children laughed and said, "what kind of college are you going to take? it's so hot. Come and drink beer and eat peanuts!"

my father thought for a few seconds and thought it was reasonable. Why did he go to college when it was so hot? he should drink beer and eat peanuts, so he joyfully joined his children, drank beer, ate peanuts, and put the university out of his mind. maybe he was thinking. Anyway. Anyway, fate has given up on him a long time ago, and he did so only to put fate in his army.

later, when we talked about it, I asked my father, "did you give up drinking beer because you couldn't pass the exam in the first place, or did you choose not to take it?"

my father said strangely, "I'm not you. How could I not be admitted to college?"

I, "."

since I gave up the exam and my life has been insulated from school, my father began to bad-mouth me. When I was in primary school, he ridiculed me for carrying a salt schoolbag every day and showing up as soon as I crossed the river. When I was in junior high school, he couldn't wait to encourage me to go to a technical school after graduation. He often said, Jinshan Silver Mountain is not as good as a skill, but I am not moved. Still want Jinshan and Silver Mountain, my father hates that iron is not made of steel, "Why don't you understand, this …"... If your parents leave you Jinshan and Silver Mountain, you have to eat empty sooner or later. Only this craftsmanship can accompany you for a lifetime so that you can have something to eat for the rest of your life. "

I, "Oh, this, this does not conflict, you first leave me Jinshan and Silver Mountain, I have a skill that is not better."

"you don't understand. It's better to teach people to fish than to teach people to fish. Have you heard that?"

"but what can you teach me? Lu Zhijun's father next door can also teach Lu Zhijun to fix black-and-white TV sets, but no one will watch black-and-white TV sets anymore."

my father told me, "although black-and-white TV sets will be out of date, cars will not be out of date. Go to a technical school and learn how to repair cars. You will have something to eat for the rest of your life."

"I don't want it."

"what do you want?"

"I'm going to lose money lying in the sky."

when my high school entrance exam was over, he, as my father, immediately jumped out to care for me and encouraged me, "you are a toad who wants to eat swan meat, ha." There is no doubt that the spring breeze is humorous and warm.

after the score came out, because my score was more than 300 points higher than my father (based on imagination) estimated, he suspected that I had quietly lost other people's admission card numbers for my fragile self-esteem. Out of a responsible attitude toward me, he immediately informed my mother of his worries. My mother was shocked, so they pressed my head together and personally pointed out my accuracy. Textual research, confirmed by a number, and made several checking phone calls, because the score is still the same, my father suspected that I used some kind of dark magic to replace other people's scores, there is another poor middle school student in this world. I stole the score and was secretly crying, and suspected that I had used another kind of dark magic, which made the system go wrong and changed the first number from 3 to 6. He got caught up in all kinds of reasoning and was so obsessed that he almost went to the Education Bureau to report me. When Checkmark called the seventh, my mother finally couldn't stand it. She rushed forward and quarreled with him like a leopard and told him to stop. Don't go too far. When you do these things, you don't think about how expensive it is to make a phone call.

because I finally didn't listen to him to major in automobile repair in technical school, and because my mother was such a "stone and iron" person, my father gradually lost all confidence in family life. Smoking and drinking are good, but this kind of hobby that consumes money from time to time can not always be carried out, so he sends his affection to literature. When he saw the 27th Legend of Heroes of the Great Flag, Ma Yike finally let go of his obsession. I've come to my senses.

the Ma Yi guest sang, "Life also has a hundred years, why is it not worth nostalgia?" We should know that the immortals in heaven are always illusory and illusory. Who can see them? How can you compare the golden bottle in front of you and the beauty at the bottom? But if you want the joy of life, the immortals will not change. "

the beauty of the quilt doesn't want to, but the golden bottle in front of her. Jantar. Taku. Yes! Life is so bitter, that you might as well indulge in drinking! The master is worthy of a master, pointing out a bright way of life.

probably it was that cross-strait communication was not convenient at that time, or Internet search was not as developed as it is today. He did not know what happened to Master Gulong in September 1985, and he thought that Qiao Qi's couplet "Xiao Li flew into a dead sound. Chu Liuxiang" and "flying snow shoots white deer, laughing at the magnificent hero relying on Biyi" means the same thing.

in short, at that time, he drank a little after work every day, sometimes drank a little, restrained himself a little, and got drunk as much as he could. He got drunk from one end of Gusu City to the other and stumbled from one alley to the other, where he was drunk, not at night.

because he was so confused and lost confidence in everything, my mother felt anxious all day, quarreled with him all the time, and he was annoyed. She also found a solution in his fate song "the Dream of the New Mandarin Duck and Butterfly". "it is already crazy in the world, why bother to go to the blue sky, it is better to sleep gently", it is better to sleep gently. Sleep together... Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Yeah! As long as you fall asleep, everything will be settled.

Blessed to the soul! So in another afternoon of fierce argument, my father slowly moved to the bedside while quarreling. At a moment when my mother was about to explode, he quickly went to bed, shook off the quilt, and covered himself tightly. "all right, I'm going to bed." Clouds and water flow in one fell swoop.

while I was doing my homework in the living room, I was stunned, and so was my mother. The atmosphere suddenly dropped to a freezing point, the scene was about to get out of control, and groups of crows were flying back and forth in the air one meter above their heads.

my father closed his eyes, looked serene and motionless, only needed to put 48 bottles of XO on his side.

I wonder if his heart reverberates with the song "but if you have a happy life, the immortals will not change."

in this way, my father waded through year after year with all kinds of enlightenment, always fishing in the river and never going ashore, which proved that it was no big deal. Don't be afraid. When I grew up and went to college, my father beat me from time to time, "my friend, it's time to raise children to guard against old age." I immediately replied in horror, "this. I. I'm poor, too. I don't think it's time yet. " Later, when I went to study in a foreign country, my father never forgot to beat me through Wechat, "my friend, it's time to raise children and guard against old age." Unexpectedly, after studying in college for many years, he finally gave up his last hope for life.

my father is such a handsome man. It has been proved by practice that as long as he is willing to give up, nothing is difficult in the world, so let's sing, "do you want to ask someone to understand or to pretend to be confused, and it is hard to be satisfied with how much you know?"