"in order to watch the World Cup, I tied up my girlfriend."

the 2018 Russia World Cup is about to begin.

 my friend A Yi looked around and confirmed that he was in a safe zone with no girlfriend within a radius of 100 meters. He typed a line in the search bar with trembling hands:  
 

how not let my girlfriend disturb his watching the game during the World Cup?

after thinking about it, I find it unrealistic. Delete another word and type it again:

how to correctly disappear and not let your girlfriend find it during the World Cup?

on the one hand, it is an obsession with football fanaticism, on the other hand, it is a deep desire to survive.

 "World Cup" and "girlfriend" are inherently incompatible with each other, which seems to be an immutable truth. (here "World Cup" can also be replaced by "playing games")  
 

so actually watching the World Cup is the same as "raising a mistress": how to be happy while not making your girlfriend jealous and angry.

 to this end, we interviewed several male fans and sorted out this "World Cup Survival Guide".  
  I hope all male fans will live well during the World Cup.

A man

it is common for my girlfriend to work late at night, but I like to watch football on TV. When there is a football game, I will prepare midnight snacks in advance and watch the ball in silence while keeping my ears open to pay attention to the sound in the corridor.

hear the elevator "ding", indicating that the enemy still has 15 seconds to arrive at the battlefield. Quickly turn off the TV and lie on the sofa and start pretending to sleep.

 then you just need to pretend to wake up when you hear the door close: "Baby, you're finally back. Are you hungry? I've prepared a midnight snack for you."  
 this feeling is more exciting than watching football, and it often gives me the illusion that I secretly watched TV and fought wits with my parents when I was a child.  
 luckily my girlfriend doesn't have my mother's habit of touching the TV first when I get home, so I can survive so far.

B man

I said I wanted to watch the game, and my girlfriend said yes.

just when she came out of the room to pour water, the camera just cut to a close-up of the football babies.

 I knew I was finished at that moment, and she must have misunderstood the "ball" I wanted to see.  
 

I still feel a dull pain in my knee when I think about it.

 the biggest advice I want to give is that when you have a premonition that there is going to be a large area of women on the screen, even the sexy and hot female audience, please move your reluctant ass to the kitchen or toilet to hide from the limelight.  
  

Searching for cowgirl wedding dresses to add a dash of grace to your outfit? Shop now and enjoy the joyful shopping experience.

Tut-tut, it's another proposition.

C man

I spent a few months frugally and frugally with some good buddies and pooled some money.

then we signed up for a tour group for our girlfriend.

anyway, a girlfriend around is always a ticking time bomb, so it's more reassuring to send her away.

D man

my girlfriend is very good and doesn't disturb me at all.

 my favorite team scored another goal. I was in a good mood and asked her, "do you want to relax?"

she looked at me expectantly and nodded hard.

so I loosened the rope around her a little bit.

Huh? Why did you wake up?

Don't disturb me, I'll sleep a little longer.

E man for the advanced version, the pursuit is not only "how not to let my girlfriend disturb me watching football", but "how to get my girlfriend to watch the game with me without losing my temper".  
 so I suggest: "how about this? every time the Chinese team scores a goal, I will pay for something in your shopping cart."  
 she thought she was smart enough to see through my trick: "the Chinese team is so bad, how can it score a goal?"  
 

I thought about it: "well, every time the Chinese team scores a goal, I will buy something for you."

girlfriend happily agreed.  
 it was only at the end of the match that she realized that something was wrong: why is there no Chinese team?

[hereby declare that this method only ensures the safety of life during the World Cup and bears the consequences at the end of the match.

F man

I have a good friend who often goes to Internet cafes with us to play games.

every time he takes his girlfriend with him, his girlfriend doesn't fight, so when we gang up, she is watching the show.

I have foreseen his scene during the World Cup.

as long as his girlfriend doesn't famine will do.

G man

save your life? It doesn't exist.

  my girlfriend only knows how to play cold war every time, when I play games, and when I watch football.  
 

she has already vaccinated me this time. If I watch the game secretly during the World Cup, she will ignore me for three days.

 after listening to her, I suddenly felt a little dazed--  
 

there are still good things for me to watch the game quietly.

H Man,

it's too easy to survive.

 as long as the team you support is invincible in the universe and the first world, it is super handsome and handsome. Donovan's little brother.

then, ask your girlfriend to pick him up.

from the above example, it is not difficult to find that although the routines are ever-changing, the core is still the same:

successfully diverts his girlfriend's attention and gives her something else to do or look forward to.

 finally, give your girlfriends a piece of advice--  
 

remember to accompany him to watch the game. If you score, watch him react first, and then decide whether to cheer or not.

and so on.

if one day he finds that he is depressed, silent, not interested in anything, and doesn't care much about you.

Don't worry, don't cry, don't make a scene, he didn't cheat, and he doesn't love you.

maybe Argentina just lost again.

if you can, turn a blind eye to straight men when it comes to watching football and playing games.